Karen Foster, a Portland, Oregon counselor and speaker, has published a new book called No Way Baby! In it, she offers people like herself, whom she calls “childfrees” information to refute the dumb things people say to them. We’re all heard these things: “So, you don’t like kids?” “It’s your duty to go forth and multiply.” “But I want grandchildren.” “Who will take care of you when you’re old?” and “You’ll regret it.” Sound familiar?
Of course, those of us who are childless by marriage or otherwise not by choice might have different answers from what Foster offers. She does acknowledge the difficulty of being in a relationship where one person wants kids and the other doesn’t. There is no way to compromise on this issue, she says. One person always loses.
Foster is not anti-child and applauds people who consciously choose to be parents, but you get a little taste of her attitude when she talks about being “child-burdened” vs. “childfree.”
There’s a lot of good information in this book, although it sometimes wanders off course. For example, we don’t need the whole history of Social Security or a rehash of the feminist movement. We can, however, find lots of useful information and encouragement for enjoying life as non-parents in this book.
Foster blogs on childfree subjects and has information about this book and her new one at www.karenfoster.net.