Childless Elderwomen Share Their Thoughts on ‘Renewal’

Renewal. What does that word mean to you? A fresh start? A new way of seeing or doing things? It seems like we ought to be discussing this in the spring, not in the midst of a huge winter storm, but renewal was the topic yesterday when childlessness guru Jody Day brought together 12 “childless elderwomen” for another solstice chat on Zoom. If you are younger and not sure whether or not you will have children, listening to these wonderful women should prove that either way you can live well and become a badass elderwoman or, as Jody likes to call us a “nomo crone.”

For me, renewal this year means taking my recovery from my fall in October and COVID in November into a concerted effort to reassess my body and my lifestyle in 2023. I am working to counter my aloneness by reaching out more to other people and creating my “village” so we can take care of each other. It also means reaching out to my family and basically demanding to spend time live and online with all of them, especially the young ones, so they know who this “Aunt Sue” is and let me be part of their lives.

Does this sound like New Year’s resolutions? Yes, but this is different. This is a restart on our lives, looking at it fresh. For some, that means getting rid of possessions that weigh us down. For others, it might be changing a life situation that has got us stuck, including this bit about your partner not wanting to have children or you not sure what you want to do. If you knew you only had a short time to live, what would you do? Don’t wait until you’re old or facing a terminal diagnosis to change what needs changing.

What do you think? I welcome your comments.

Have a wonderful holiday. Do your best to make it your own. All of you are a gift for me. Thank you for being here.


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4 thoughts on “Childless Elderwomen Share Their Thoughts on ‘Renewal’

  1. God bless you, Sue. Thank you for sharing your work and thoughts — you are a help to so many you will likely never meet. I pray your 2023 reassessment and outreach will bring a bounty of connection and assistance to you, and I thank you for the encouragement to contemplate and tackle some projects of my own. Merry Christmas!


  2. Sue,

    Your posts always make me think. And very deeply. If I ever get a “do over”, I’ll marry much younger than I did. And kids would be requirement. And maybe I’d be a good parent. Maybe I wouldn’t.

    One thing I know for sure, I wouldn’t marry a single mother again. Being a stepfather is the emptiest most lackluster experience I’ve ever had. And this has been seen as an evil in me.
    I don’t ever want to be a stepfather again. EVER ! Merry Christmas !


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