It’s almost Mother’s Day. Judging by everything I’m seeing all around me, it already is Mother’s Day and it lasts for several weeks. I don’t know many women who actually enjoy Mother’s Day. Most of us either don’t have kids, do have kids but don’t get along with them, don’t have a living mother to honor or don’t get along with their mothers and grandmothers. For everybody, the day seems to be fraught with tension. Have to get a gift. Have to send flowers. Have to take Mom out to brunch. But what are the siblings doing? Poor Mom can get pulled around among the kids till she feels like a Stretch Armstrong doll.
I was recently invited to join a new online support group called “Childless Mothers Connect.” It’s a colorful site with lots of opportunities to network with other childless women. So far, it’s so new that there isn’t much there yet, but I joined. I can see how it can be valuable in the future. The site includes forums for a variety of interests, including “Adoring Aunties,” “Relationship Rap,” “Savvy Stepmoms” and “Moms to the 4-Legged.” The founder, Dr. Marcy Cole, blogs and comments on childlessness.
Cole’s theory is that we are all mothers in some way, even if we don’t have actual human children. I have toyed with the concept, considering whether we all have an innate need to nurture, to take care of the young and old, to create with what some call our “womb energy.” In the end, I’m just not comfortable with the theory. Something doesn’t feel right about it.
What do you think? Do you accept the term “childless mother”? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Check out the Childless Mothers Connect website. You might find something you need there.
I had hoped to show you the Childless by Marriage book cover today, but the artist and I have not reached agreement yet. Stay tuned.